EDIT: you guys, i got a job! and one of my interviewers had read this post, and liked it. so, reverse-job-posting: recommended. however, now that i am employed, i'm once again removing my last name and resume from this post, just to be safe.
dear non-profit leader/social entrepreneur who definitely wants to hire me even though you may not know it yet,
hi! i’m seeking an entry-level position in a new york city non-profit or b corporation, and for a while i tried to keep this blog from being connected with my full name, lest it be found by someone in human resources at the Non-Profit or B Corporation of my Dreams, Inc. and they find out that i sometimes blog unabashedly about my love for dark chocolate sorbet and the fact that i occasionally relate to amanda palmer and that while blogging about both of these things, i staunchly refuse to use capital letters. however, i’m over that. if you’ve googled me, that means you haven’t immediately discarded my resume and thus, i have a chance. this is my attempt to make the most of that chance.
my name is lindsay, and this is why you should hire me:
while i don’t have “3+ years of professional experience”, which your ad likely states as a desired qualification, what i have is better. since my teenage years, i have thrown myself tirelessly into causes that ignite my passion. i have dragged my friends in college to documentary screenings. i have been “that feminist” at the party who calls people out on using derogatory language. i have spent a week on a bus across the country telling people why they should care about child soldiers in eastern africa. i have served cocktails at fundraising galas. i have written thank you letters to donors. i have had my own caseloads of clients at two social work field placements, in which i traveled throughout brooklyn providing case management to children and individual therapy to survivors of interpersonal crime. i have planned a legislative advocacy day for legislation related to domestic violence and sexual assault, then traveled to albany with a team of survivors and advocates to discuss these issues with our elected officials. (i’ve also discussed conflict in eastern africa and access to birth control with my elected officials. i’m a big fan of democracy.) basically, i have worked my ass off, in a variety of ways, to make a difference where i see injustice, and i have not been paid for any of it. i will work even harder for your organization or company. (i’m ready to get paid, though. student loans are no joke. my desired salary is $30,000 per year, but i can be flexible. let’s talk.) as your program/operations/development assistant or [insert job title here], i will hobnob with donors and potential donors, slave over databases, plan logistics for events, brainstorm, manage relationships with clients, recruit and organize volunteers, run errands, respond to email and phone queries, manage social media outreach, or do whatever other little things come up along the way. i’m more than willing to contribute to many different parts of your team.
bonus reasons to hire me:
i love baking and i will periodically and without warning bring delicious shareable goodies to the office.
i have that young, idealistic, passion-driven energy that is hard to come by in seasoned professionals and can invigorate a team.
i’m a social worker. you know that person in the office who gets everybody to chill out and re-focus when everything seems a mess? hi.
if you’d like to get in touch, email me at email@example.com.